The Story Behind: Boundaries

Mandala The Story Behind

Designed around November 2017 and being completed and released on my social in January 2018, Boundaries had the underlying hidden meanings of freedom, evolution, progression. It was the first piece released in 2018 that marked the start of a new chapter.

It followed from Anticipation, Fundamental and Medallion and was the prequel piece to the break up with that artist ex of mine. Oh yes, it was a big one. But it was a big one that I didn't even know about at the time, I mean now I look back and I'm like "oh, well that makes sense...". 

So when I first posted this, it wasn't a huge deal on my social, but I captioned it something from the book that changed my mind, changed my life - The Motivation Manifesto by Brendon Burchard (I strongly recommend reading this if you haven't already) -: 

"Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth" - Brendon Burchard.
We somehow found the most constrained things beautiful, why? Because we see the potential within them for when they are free. 

It wasn't a huge deal at all, no crazy obvious, surface-level depth like the rest of my captions, because this one for me was all about my subconscious. At the time this was being designed, me and that ex were coming through yet another one of our "space breaks" baring in mind this was already after I moved to London and was now only 30mins door to door from his, rather than 2 hours. By the time it was completed, we had supposedly come through it, but it wasn't the same. We used to spend a lot of time working in coffee shops - particularly Costa across Lakeside and Bluewater (the one in Waterstones was my personal favourite because of the views outside the windows), and I remember the day so clearly - we sat at my favourite spot (was in sight of the window, big 4 seater table and also had a plug socket - essentials), he was working away on his Guru Gobind Singh Ji Vector and I was designing Boundaries, and it was one of the first few times we saw each other after the break (which was before our 1 year anniversary, we spent NYE together, and then this time) and it felt off, awkward even between us. Like you could feel the space between us even though we were sat right next to one another. We both knew deep down it wasn't right, something wasn't right, but I never spoke about it and he kept pulling away until a week later he broke it off - multiple excuses all of which made no sense to me. 

Alright so that was back story - how does it relate to the piece? Well if you see the product page, it's captioned "Designed initially to become unbreakable from a 20x20cm square, Boundaries is all about evolution, progression, determination to become something more than a simple idea." The words evolution, progression and determination to become something more than a simple idea - that's how. Boundaries was a representation of being kept in a box and about breaking out that mould, breaking out of comfort zones to evolve, to become the next best version of yourself and the progression of time and internal work to do that - the healing. The healing to become more than just an 'ordinary, normal' person. 

Now let me break it down more for you - 
Boundaries - we're worth more than being confined to what we allow someone to label (or not label) us as - in my case with him, his family didn't even know I was his girlfriend, whereas he met all of my family, including my grandparents which for an Asian culture is HUGGEEEE thing! But I was secret on his side, his friends knew, but not the people who mattered. He kept me in a box, but equally, I kept myself in it too by allowing him to do it - not standing up for myself more to say it mattered to me. I did once, and it didn't go down so well, so I didn't say it again after that but it still bugged me. To be honest, there was a lot that bugged me, so I guess Boundaries was also a representation of my mind - thoughts, feelings, emotions, anxiety, everything all restricted to being in my head with not being able to have a real outlet for it - I couldn't open up to him, I mean I could but the emotional intelligence I needed back was never there, so I struggled. And for me that's a really big thing, I needed to feel that connection and it was so hard. I also recently got told by my best friend I have 'an artistic mind; I see things with an artistic mind' and it just came to me now under one of a million interpretations of that line - I quite literally see things with mandalas surrounding them 50% of the time, but it also means I see things with such complexity sometimes. It's a blessing and a curse at the same time, because I constantly need an outlet - be it verbally or written, I constantly need an outlet for it because having this kind of mind can often be overwhelming.
Going back to The Motivation Manifesto - conformity is the jailer of freedom - going to a generic society reference - we follow what's considered to be 'the norm' - go to school, get an education, go for higher education, get job, pay the bills, retire on a shit retirement fund wage and then die. We live without living, because we dare not to be free. We dream to be free, but are we really? What is freedom when we all conform to society standards and procedures? Do we know growth outside of a career aspect or growing and reproducing for a family? How many people can honestly say they've grown and healed and taken a chance on their dreams for whatever the outcome is to have a chance at being free? I said in my caption on social that we often find the most constrained things beautiful because we see the potential in them for when they are free right - imagine a bird. They're kept as pets, but don't we suddenly find them the most graceful and elegant once they're let out and set free? It's the same for people - there's so many beautiful souls we meet on a daily that are caught up in society's standards, friends, family, I know a lot of beautiful souls personally and I'm grateful I do, because I know for the second they feel free, is the moment they'll become the brightest looking diamond on this Earth.
Boundaries represented this - confining thoughts and the world I see into one box with the feeling of no outlet, until the geometric and pattern versions were released... 

And there lies evolve - the second we've broken free from that mind, that thought, the hold of whatever shape, size or form it comes in - the possibilities of evolution seem endless. But evolution and progression come together - because it never seems possible to evolve just like that - it requires a slightly different mindset, slightly different thought trail - something that sparks your soul to make you think, nope, change the game.
We think of evolution as monkeys into man, and as much as that was evolution, was it really? We evolved to becoming part of 'the rat race', work/home/work/home constantly til we retire dying to catch a break sometime yet we never do because there's bills and little annual leave or some emergency that stops us from living. But those breaks that give us a chance to catch our breath, are the ones that give us a split second to reflect, to go inward, to say what we feel and think for once rather than what everyone else wants to hear or is convenient for them on their terms. 
For my back story - the evolution and progression was into the person I became after the break up, learning about myself, how to be by myself in a brand new city - what my hobbies were, my style, my dress sense, my social circle, my job, favourite foods again - literally everything! Everything was progression towards my evolution - evolution into the artist who sits here writing this blog for you to read today, being able to share this thought trail and reflection with you for you to get even the slightest insight into my story to interpret these pieces as you see fit. 

So why the name 'Boundaries'? I guess a lot of the above hopefully explains it, but truth be told, the quote had a huge part to play in it. It was the only word that felt most fitting for a mind that felt boxed in, an artist who felt boxed in emotionally, one who needed to heal and figure out who she was to evolve and become the next best level-up version of myself, without even consciously knowing that this is what this piece held for me. The geometric patterns were released after the break up, and it was the beautiful representation of evolution because by that point I was 'free' of this mould I was in of being another artists girlfriend, and I wish I could say partner but that only ever felt one sided from my side, but they signified endless possibilities, endless thoughts and how they all link together to always create one beautiful masterpiece no matter how long it goes on for, the progression of that journey will always get you to a finish line. The question is - can you first break out of that mould? That mould either you created yourself, someone else put you in, society put you in? 

For those who wish to, you can shop Boundaries online here.

Thank you for reading & keep your eyes peeled for future piece meanings being shared across the blog and also socials. Feel free to share your thoughts, comments and even your own interpretations in the comments below or if you wish to let me know privately - I'm always social on emails and my social media channels. 

One love - Simmy. x

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